The one thing that has changed my sleeping life, for like…ever.

Ever since I was little I can remember loving the feeling of pressure on me. Not the inside pressure, where I had to decide if I was going to begin my forgery career, or just admit to my teacher my mom did NOT sign my agenda and I would be sitting inside for recess. (I’ll let you choose what one I decided on) What I mean is, like when a friend sits on you in, what I can only assume, an attempt to kill you. They’re screaming at you “DOES THIS HURT??!” and you’re laying there like……ummm…actually it doesn’t and this is great. Same thing as when my cat, on an extremely rare occasion (I’m talking rare like my cousin showers AND brushes his teeth in the same day rare) sits on my chest. Im like, oh my god live here on my chest forever please. It just felt so calming? What an odd thing. Or so I thought.

Turns out….It’s not actually that weird.

It is like an actual thing that helps people. Something about Deep Touch Pressure, and how it can reduce activity in the nervous system, or even go as far as like the pressure, like a hug, releases serotonin and endorphins and other science shit. Nobody ever told me this life changing information. I stumbled upon it when I discovered…*drum roll please*…..

A Weighted Blanket (!!!!)

What. The. Fork. (if you have not watched NBC’s The Good Place, do it). They are just literally heavy ass blankets that trap you into a great nights sleep. I knew I needed one ON SIGHT, but the price tag said “I’m better than you and I had coach tennis shoes in the 8th grade.” It was right, I couldn’t afford it and it was better than me. I don’t deserve good sleep, in my damn Joe Boxer pajamas. The blanket costs, like, 1/3 of a Louis Vuitton handbag (that is the only way I determine monetary value). So, I lived without it.

Until I couldn’t live without it anymore. My anxiety manifests in its complete “Coraline Other Mother” stage at night. Making it terrible to sleep. 1 night a month I’d sleep all the way through. The other 29 days were plagued with midnight wake ups, cold sweats, mind wandering, you get it. If there was something, anything (not drugs) that could fix this problem, I’m trying it damn it.

So, I browsed.

I passed $400 blankets, $200 dollar blankets, my laptop collected tears. So I looked up how to make one myself, I’m an independent woman I could do it. Long story short, it’s expensive and not at all worth it. So, I continued looking. They’re priced by weight generally, and since these blankets are geared towards children (and I am in fact not a physical child), the weight for an adult was adding up. I’m like okay, either I need to win the lottery or lose 50 of my 115 pounds. I didn’t care what one at this point. AND THEN, I found it. After hours on the internet I found a blanket, in my size for 120 dollars. While contemplating purchasing it, I decided to browse the makers page. She lived TWENTY minutes away from me. I heard Britney Spears playing faintly in the background “Give me a siiiIIIiiIiiign”. I bought it.

She made it by hand and I had in my bed in a little less than a month. (I had a custom made one because I’m bougie and I wanted it to match).

My sleep has never been the same.

I have a fitbit JUST to track my sleep. I am obsessed with sleep tracking, I cant stand not knowing how I slept.

It should be noted that “light sleep” is actually good and is where the majority of our sleep is. Deep sleep is like if you drink too many flaming Dr. Pepper’s and pass out. REM sleep is where you do your hardcore inception dreaming. Awake is when you’re usually playing Yahtzee or questioning all of your life choices.

I am getting way more quality sleep and am waking up substantially less. This shit is magic. If the three brothers in Harry Potter had half of a brain, they would have made a weighted blanket instead of an invisibility cloak.

Just so you know, I know the invisibility cloak is crucial to the plot line of Harry Potter and the brother asked for the cloak in order to hide from death. It was a joke, I take Harry Potter very seriously.

It literally feels like NyQuil for your entire body. You are just covered up, weight all over you like you’re getting a bear hug. I swear to you, it is life changing.

I really encourage you to check out Alma-Dean Originals. She made my weighted blanket for me and her customer service was above and beyond. When buying it, you really want to get a small size. Like a twin bed, you want the blanket to be the size of your body that way you are getting allllll that weight, and its not just sitting on your bed…..going to waste. You should check this article out to get the right weight. I wanted to get a 50 pound blanket just to make sure it worked, but apparently I would die. I opted for a more reasonable one.

That is the size of mine.

If you have trouble sleeping for ANY reason, if you have a child who has trouble sleeping for any reason, or if want to really relax after work I highly recommend researching a weighted blanket and seeing if it sounds right for you. It has made such a difference in my life and I can’t believe I let myself go so long without it.

HERE’S TO THAT GOOD SLEEP!

and yes, I now have 3 blankets (and a heated mattress pad).

Do you have one? Are you going to purchase one? Give me the deeeeets

April 18, 2018
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